Anyway, this weekend I was so excited to do a mini get away and a lil blast from my past college reunion. My college roommate bestie Munchie (aka Nicole, if that's too weird for you) and I were headed to mpls for another roomie's wedding. Munchie and I lived together all four years of college and kept each other sane, and well a little bit insane really. She taught me really important lessons like how to clean basically everything. I taught her really important lessons about like, well ok, I am not admitting to the lessons I taught her, because they are a little less than admirable. Also, I convinced her to pierce her ears. I'm such a bad influence!!! Anyway Munchie and I were like the most boring freshman collegians on the planet and then our sophomore year we met our new roomies Kara and Nicki. I have to say, that woke us up a little and we definitely had more fun after that. We only lived with them for a year but we had some good times. Anyway enough about college, we were headed into mpls for Nicki's wedding. We took off early afternoon on Friday and did a little shopping and ate dinner, pulling into the lovely home of my friend Jen at about 8. Jen has a condo in Edina and was up at her lake cabin for the weekend. We stayed in her home instead of a hotel to save on expenses and well its just way more comfortable for me. Also, she has my cat neice LuLu (aka Muffin Top...and that's a whole nother bloggable story there) that I can spoil while I stay. We happily crashed for the night. The next day we did the IKEA thing and I bought a bunch of lovey things I don't really need, hit PF Changs and hurried home to get ready for the wedding.
Being two busy moms we aren't really that used to having leisurely time to get ourselves "primped". So when we were getting ready before the ceremony we kind of messed around and took our time... Unfortunately time snuck up on us and we had to RUSH to make it to the wedding on time. It took us exactly 21 minutes to get to the wedding. Whew! We slid into our seats right on time. After a sweet ceremony, we enjoyed the dinner and reception followed by the dance where we reverted into old college habits by nicknaming everyone on the dance floor by their awesome dance moves/ wedding attire/ general behavior. Good times. I didn't actually dance one single dance, but I thoroughly enjoyed myself and giggled like a college freshmen that had yet to know the true pain of a student loan ;)
Around 11pm, my cheeks began to hurt from the giggles and Munch and I agreed we were getting tired. We congregated one more time with Nicki and Kara, chatted up some about the good ole days and headed out.
Munch and I continued to chatter as we got out to the car. I changed into flip flops, got into the drivers side and turned the key. The engine turns and turns and turns but never starts. I try again. Still nothing. I continue to try a few more times thinking that this can't be happening, but no luck. Finally I do what every really lucky (forever 29 year old) girl does. I picked up the phone.... "Daddy?" I walked through the situation with my dad and we tried a few things but still had no luck. In frustration I hung up the phone and dialed the life saving wonderment ( and best Christmas gift a daughter can get) AAA. They sent a someone for a jump because I'm a dumb blonde who probably just left her lights on. I asked them politely to also send a jump that can tow because I'm pretty sure a jump won't be helping. The AAA lady said sure and told me to wait by the car and estimated my wait time to be one hour.
I twiddled my thumbs and less than five minutes later a tow truck arrived with a driver that was a scary mix between Sean Connery and Willy Wonka from the hood. He pulled out his cables and told me he was here to jump my car. Um ok, I guess you can try! By golly, I was really hoping I was just being a dumb blonde and the jump would work. ( side note: my dumb blonde moments significantly decrease around chestnut haired Munch, so I was less than confident in Sean-Willery) anyway Wonka-Con attempted 2 half heartfelt jumps and then asked, well what do you want me to do with it? I bit my tongue at the real answer which has something to do with gasoline and a very steep cliff and I told him I wanted it towed to Willmar. Willmar! He said it like I was on drugs. "it's 96 miles" Munchie says matter of factly, we are both well aware of AAA's 100 mile towing policy ;). He says he has to do some checking and he'll be right back. He hops into his tow truck, argues with the GPS and AAA lady and come back out saying "I guess I'm going to Willmar". I told him there was no rush and he could take it in tomorrow. (partially I was remembering my husbands golf clubs were in the trunk and thinking... Take all the time you need buddy)
Munch spotted a cab near the entrance of the convention center and while I was finishing up paperwork with Tow-Wonka, she wandered over to see if it was available. She asked the cabbie if he had a fare or if he could take us. He asked her where she was headed and when she said Edina, the $$ lit his eyes and he said the ride was ours. The cabbie pulled around to where I was standing and while I pulled some things out of the trunk something interesting transpired. A drunken man came running out of a different reception hall yelling "hey, that's my cab! Explicative, you took my cab, bleep bleep bleep!" The cabbie calmly replied that he already had passengers. The drunk responded " I just bleepin talked to you on the bleeping phone! This is my cab! Explicative. Why the bleep are you taking my cab?" explicative."
I hurriedly bid the tow man goodbye and jumped in the cab, apologizing to the cabbie for the scene we just caused. The cabbie replied that it happens all the time, and I once again silently thanked God for my college education, as we left the drunken wedding guest in the dust shaking his arms in the air.
The cabbie put our destination address into his GPS and headed on his way to our condo "home away from home". I should have known something was fishy when he started driving the absolute opposite direction that we had driven in on, but I was still a little shaken from drunken man, Connery-Wonka and the car fail, so I sat in my seat and tried to conjur up the images of the wonderment of the IKEA treats I had bought earlier in the day. About 15 minutes later I glanced at the meter running and noticed it climbing above the $25 mark and peeking out the window realized we were somewhere on 35w. "Munchie" I said, "do you have cash?" "yes, I have quite a bit in my wallet" she says. "good" I reply "because I only have $3 and the meter is already past $25, and I'm pretty sure we just passed Albert Lea".
"shut up". She says. "no, really Albert Lea" I say, "and I only had like $15 in cash because that way I could only have a few drinks, I thought it was a good plan".
"no", she says "shut up.... I can't find my wallet".
"WHAT?!?" I say.
"it's not in my purse"
"oh crap" I say.
"I know", she says "how are we going to pay for this cab ride?"
"no" I say "was it a big brown square double zipper one?"
"yes" she says quietly.
"I saw it" I said. I looked down at my dirty sticky feet. "when we were leaving the reception you walked off, and there was this wallet on the floor in between tables, I picked it up and called after you thinking you would know what to do with it, but you didn't hear me. There was an open purse sitting on the chair in front of me so I thought about putting it in the purse, but I second guessed and put it on the table in front of me!"
"crap" she says.
"ok" I said jumping into action, " you talk to the cabbie and tell him we have to find an ATM because you have no wallet and no cash, I'll call around to locate the wallet".
And so the chase began. Cabbie wandered around 35w and 494 until the meter entered the $50 mark before finally getting to France ave. I called everyone and their brother talking to voicemail after voicemail leaving inaudible messages about AAA and expensive cab rides and lost wallets. Finally I told Mr. Cabbie that if he would kindly cut over to York there was a Walgreens and a CVS within 10 feet of each other both 24 hours, at which I could get some cash and kindly end this 45 mind ride from hell. He obliged and I was in no time staring at a cash machine desperately trying to remember my pin number. (darn you dopamax!!!!) pin number recovered, I grabbed the cash and dashed back to the cab. ( I popped out an extra $20 just in case cabbie decided to take the longest possible route back the 2 blocks to the condo to run up the meter, I mean... at this rate, I'm not taking any chances!!)
Meanwhile Munch had come up with a new strategy of trying to call the hotel where the bride had reserved rooms, to see if she could reach someone to recover the wallet. She left some more voicemails until finally reaching the front desk clerk. Remember when I said I taught Munchie some skills in college? This is a time where I think some of those not so brag-worthy skills come in handy. I pass my drama-queen tiara to the princess in training ;) she said something to the effect of this, and I need to edit, to protect the innocent and the not so innocent...
"ok, so I'm trying to get ahold of my friend Nicki, we were just at her wedding, and our car wouldn't start so we had to call AAA and get it towed, and then we had to call a cab to haul us reeeaaally far across town and half way home we realized that we lost my wallet at the reception and we dont have any money to pay for this really expensive cab ride, so I really need to get ahold of my friend Nicki and find my wallet!!!!" and the front desk lady says..... "well, ummm...." and then Munch adds a bombshell of a line that I can not share and ends it with " and I'm gonna start bawling!!!!!". (check and mate, baby!)
The front desk lady responds "ok, honey, just take a deep breath now. There is a bridal party at the bar right now. What is the bride wearing?"
Pause. Um. What?
" uh. A WEDDING GOWN!" (thanking God for college education once more)
"oh, ok. What's are the bridesmaids wearing?"
And on with this until we determine that yes, this is our Nicki, our bride, and the front desk clerk cannot possibly humiliate herself anymore than she already has by putting THE wrong bride, or THE wrong Nicki on the phone, and she says she will go get her.
At this point the cab pulls up to the condo, Munch hurls herself out onto the pavement and onto a nearby bench. I check the meter. Pull my jaw off the floor and pay the cabbie is unearned $63, for what should have been a 21 mile cab ride that took more than 44 minutes :(. I carefully check the cab floor for any items we may have left, knowing full well that we have no way of recovering anything since we stole this cab from drunken guy, we do not know the cab company name, driver, car number or phone number. heaven forbid I should lose my wallet, Jen's keys or my new 4 inch teal wedges in there.
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| it aint easy being green, but it sure is pretty |
Yep. Receipts. Thank goodness. If they had robbed you of the ability to return that Ikea duvet, I think I might start to hyperventilate ;) Im joking of course, we were all very relieved that everything was returned and found and good. Besides the fact that we had to pull the bride away from her party on her wedding night. But we'll say that we are even on that one, right girls ;)
I then spent the next two hours doped up on adrenaline and drama, unable to sleep, watching HGTV until 3am.
So my poor dad, who has repeatedly told me to get rid of the unreliable car, had the pleasure of using his Sunday to chauffeur Munchie and I home from Mpls. As I write this blog, I sit and think of how, 30 years from now I will still be a parent and I will still have the pleasure of my then thirty-something year old Lola or Greta calling me up in the middle of the night and saying ...."Mommmm?"
Gotta. Love. It.
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| the girls |
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