Driving... Me crazy

I just want to dedicate this post to all those moms out there that successfully drive a car everyday without killing someone. Seriously, they should make you go through a driving course before you become a parent. Ideally one that requires you to safely maneuver your minivan around town while listening to the competing noise of a barney soundtrack and a baby screaming at the top of it's lungs. Additionally you would have random pointed objects lobbed at your head and be required to reach for a sippy cup in the third row seat.
Honestly, driving with kids is one of my most challenging day to day tasks. I was involved in a car accident back in may ( you can read about it here) and because of it, have developed a nasty bit of anxiety regarding other cars in traffic. I am constantly thinking that the other car at the stoplight is not going to stop, the car behind me is going to rear end me and the oncoming cars won't stay in their lane. On top of this fear, is the lovely distraction of my children. Just recently, Lola learned that "red means stop and green means go". ( i blame a Dora episode) Unfortunately for me, she has decided that whenever she see's a red light (no matter how far away) she will scream "STOP!" at the top of her lungs. No matter how many times it happens in a car ride, I still instinctively slam on the breaks, thinking she sees something that I don't. Another favorite exclamation is whenever she sees a semi or other super large vehicle, she will yell "WATCH OUT!!!" again prompting me to slam on my breaks. ( I am really regretting the decision to turn her forward facing! The cost of a different carseat with a taller back, would have been much cheaper than replacing my breaks, not to mention my sanity)
When she is not screaming warnings to me, she is singing at the top of her lungs to whatever annoying soundtrack she insists we listen to. Usually a Dora cd or the tutti ta. If I turn the music off, she combines the two annoying habits and sings out her warnings..."mommy's driving! she's going fast! She better stoooppp! Stoooopppp! Here comes a biiiiiggg truck! Watch out! Gooooooooo!"
The girl could not sit quietly if her life depended on it. On a good day, she'll sing about her princesses and whatever she sees out her window. Sometimes she throws in a theatrical disney number, like " i have a dream" from tangled. For your listening pleasure, an audio sample of her latest song....

Greta on the other hand is rather quiet on car rides. She doesn't usually utter a word... I might even forget that she is in the car, if it weren't for the random objects she hurls at my head. Usually it's a board book or sippy cup, but when I am smart enough to confiscate these items, she simply removes her socks and shoes and throws them. When she runs out of ammunition, Lola will supply her with additional items (anything she can reach...I am truly lucky it's usually nothing that will knock me out cold)

So the next time you see my sky blue minivan careening down the highway...quit your judging and have a little sympathy ;) i'm struggling to keep my sanity in there!!